I am full of desire.

It’s because I was made in the image of God who, in the beginning, desired to make man in His image–both male and female; He made us. And we….the desire as well…are “good”. God said so Himself.

I have this place inside of me that always stays hungry and desires to be filled with good things….but I’ve learned that I can not trust myself to define or determine what “good” might mean. I’ve learned to trust that in His time, God will reveal what is good and I can trust Him to call “good” good when it really is.

In the meantime, there’s work to be done in me and through me because really, it’s not about me at all. I’m just a gloriously flawed part of God’s bigger plan.

In the meantime, there’s work to be done; God gives and takes away.  He’s searches my heart, my ways and my intentions and those things I’m holding on to for dear life. Those things I packed in my bag or hold tightly in my hand  {because I THINK I might need them for my journey;} even though He told me to leave it all behind.

He loosens my anxious grasp on these things, either through joy or through sorrow and gratefully, I place them in His hand–where they are much safer anyway.

And then I realize I want more…desire more of Him, from Him…for Him. I realize where I fit into the picture and how big God is and how small and tired and weak I can be at times. I tremble before Him in my finite-ness. What? How? When? Where? The questions rise over me like a huge wave and I’m brought low. Humility.

Lovingly, He raises me up through the power of His promises and asks me only one question–more for me than for Him: “What do you have in your hand?” And then I see them–the things God placed into my hand in exchange for those things I had given over to His care:

* whatever He brings my hand to do
* whatever pain I’m asked to bear for another, I hold for His glory,
* each gift, each talent, each moment of strength and weakness

is enough.

God  loosens my grasp on the earthly and daily strengthens my grip for the eternal and gives me the grace… of enough each day.

And His “enough” …living there…has become my greatest desire.

8 thoughts on “Desire

    1. Thanks Andrea! You need to go back and read “Something Bigger Than Me”…it’s part of my personal testimony. I am so glad to have found another “freaky weirdo” for Jesus!

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